Has Jesus Spotted Me?

Once again He went out beside the lake and a large crowd came to Him and He began to teach them. And as He walked further He saw Levi the son of Alpheus sitting at the tax collector’s booth and He said to him, "Follow me." And he got up and followed Him. And while He was sitted eating at his table, many tax collectors and sinners were sitting with Jesus and His disciples ... (Mark 2:13-15)

Many people come to hear Jesus. They go out to see Him but they seem interested in Him only as a teacher. They listen to Him, ask for advice, and are eager to hear His revelations. And then there is Levi. He does not look for Jesus. Jesus is the one who spots him: as He walked further, He saw Levi. Only if Jesus sees me, only this can bring change in my life. The crowd, eager for His teaching, changes perhaps only from an intellectual point of view, but Levi is different. Jesus’ glance moves him, causes him to follow Jesus. He simply cannot resist it in spite of himself. One of Caravaggio's paintings depicts this scene: everybody else has noticed Jesus, except for Levi who is too busy counting his money.

Jesus goes to Levi’s house, an important event, since not everybody is honoured by such a visit. And Levi follows Jesus into his own house, shy and scared like a puppy. Jesus goes in first and Levi is simply following Him, even though this is his own house. Jesus sits down at the table, but Levi does not dare to. Jesus has to invite him to sit down, to sit at his own table. And why? Because from now on nothing in that house belongs to Levi; it all belongs to Jesus!

Following Jesus means I follow no matter where He goes. The crowd can choose what parts of His teachings to keep and what to ignore, but being mature in faith means I am just like a child who follows obediently.

[GEN, (c)2004]

Meaning and Relationship

...the Bible has just one meaning. The Bible text. And this meaning is a Person. Just one meaning. But the problem is, yes, it's just one meaning but this meaning is a Person. What does this meaning require? A relationship with the Person. A relationship with the tri-unity of the Person. But this Person, you cannot catch, you know? You can't put this Person in your pocket, to be there so you can say, "Here is the Chief of my interpretation." You know? You can see this tension between having one meaning and having various meanings because if the various meanings don't mean the relationship with the Person, ...throw them out. If the one meaning doesn't have the relationship with the Person, ...throw it out.

The history of the church is about this tension. Tension not with the meanings, but tension with this Person. If we are not in a continuous tension with the Person -- you know, a continuous tension with the Person, because sometimes He is against me. Yes, sometimes, He is against me. You find this in Jeremiah when he says that God is like an enemy to us. (Jeremiah 30:14) And He is against me and I have to accept this meaning also. I have to accept the meaning which is against me, because if I accept the meaning which is against me, I can have the grace to realize that the meaning which is against me, it is for me. The suffering of someone, it is against this person, but it's a big miracle to realize that the suffering, it is also for me.

[AV, (c)2004]

The School of Lowliness

Every Sunday morning [in the prison camp] I was required to present myself to the official's office... to verify my presence... I have often heard of and read about various univer­sities, public schools, and Bible schools. But I never really understood or had any concept of what it was like to be enrolled in this school that I call the School of Humility. I know that if such a school was to open in actuality, it would soon close for the lack of stu­dents... No man wants to learn of the school of lowliness and love. Without attending these two, all the other schools of life are meaningless... No matter how many times you would ask me of the mystery of the Christian life, I would tell you again and again, lowliness. I would answer that even if the true answer was something else.

In this school, learning comes from repetition of the class. There is only one mystery in the world, and that is the mystery of lowliness... Man will choose death rather than con­tinue in humiliation. In lowliness the truth is revealed of how false death really is. It is in humiliation that death of the self happens.

I repeated this class every week as I stood in line to present myself to the officials... I hurt from the abusive way we were treated and spoken to... I would cry... One day, though, I learned that these tears were not real tears at all. I heard clearly the Word of the Lord to me saying, "Learn of Me, for I am meek and lowly in heart, and ye shall find rest in your souls". It hit me like a hammer and... I said to the Lord, "Now I understand you, Lord. Until now I have not been learning from you, but from people"... I was not to go to my "school" each week with tears, but with joy as one who goes with her Teacher. He not only speaks of this lowliness, but He demonstrates it and shows us how to put it into practice... In Christ, lowliness was in the heart, yet in myself lowliness was only in my mind. Lowliness cannot be learned by the mind. It can only be learned by practice of it and exercise of it in each person's life...

His burden seemed so light now and in that building I was meeting in a new way my Lord. My peace and serenity was not tied to my external circum­stances, but to my Father who is in control, and cre­ates all circumstances.

[JF, OATR, (c)1989]

Beloved Or Lovable

My beloved brethren.
(I Corinthians 15:58)

Who were these "beloved brethren?" Those people who called Paul names. Those who called him a swindler and a materialistic man and a false apostle. Those who slandered him, destroying his human and divine honor. Those who thought that his presence was weak and his speech poor. And these people were believers, not pagans. It was believers who judged Paul, Paul who hardly dared to say of himself, "I am a believer." And yet, amazingly, Paul writes of them that they are "my beloved brethren." He is not concerned that they should love him, but that he should love them, these wayward and contentious and critical and quarrelsome people. "Why? Because I do not love you? God knows." (2 Corinthians 11:11)

Why are these people so dear to Paul? Is there anything lovable in them? Is there anything lovable in us? No, there is nothing. But Paul does not look in them for that which he can love, but for That Whom he can love. That is lovable. Christ is lovable Who abides in them. This is the only true reason for love. There is no other reason but this; that I love for His sake. Only then will my duty be not in vain, if I am loving Him in the other person. If I love Him in the unlovable community. Only then can I be steadfast, if I love Him in the church and in my friends and in my enemies, in everybody. If I love Him in myself. There is no other way.

When I confessed my feelings to my would-be wife, her answer was like a damper to my burning heart; but then I understood that it was a declaration of love. "Don`t love me," she said. "Love Jesus, and what is left is enough for me."

[FV, HFTR, (c)2003]